Finding That Loving Feeling
by unpinned grenade
Summary: Bella has always done what she is told including marrying the man her parents chose for her.He's a good husband but there just isn't any fire in their relationship.Can a handsome stranger she meets help her to find that loving feeling she has never found.


This wasn't supposed to happen, I shouldn't be here. Yet here I was sitting at a bar side table with several of my friends pretending to be involved in the conversation floating around me.

I wasn't one of those women. You know the ones I'm talking about. You see them sitting at the bar eyes glazed over looking for the newest boy toy to offer to buy her a drink. No I wasn't one of those kinds of women. I was a good girl, sweet, dedicated and loving wife to an upstanding pillar of my community, and yet my eyes keep wandering over to the pool tables and zeroing in on the finest ass I'veever seen.

Clad in tight dark washed jeans it is high, firm and perfectly squeezable. My tongue dartd out on its own violation to lick my suddenly dry lips. The man was sex on legs no doubt about it and I guess there really was no harm in just looking right? It wasn't like I was cheating or anything, I was just observing. Guys do it all the time, and as the saying goes what's good for the goose is good for the gander.

Nope it wasn't like he kept turning and smirking at me or anything like that. Nooo, nothing like that. And so what if a drink had miraculously been sent over to my table compliments of said gentleman with a wink and a wave. It would have been rude of me to decline such a nice offering.

So I sit sipping my dry martini, laughing with my friends and flirting with the nice assed guy who bought me a drink. Man for some reason my ring finger is really starting to burn.

"Oh my god you guys, tall dark and dreamy is coming over here". My best friend Angela was actually giggling like a schoolgirl so I hit her with my purse.

"Ouch, dammit Bella what is wrong with you?" She looks at me angrily but I really don't give a shit because he is standing behind me. I can feel the heat coming off his body since he's standing so close, I can also smell his cologne.

He clears his throat and I turn my head slightly so that I'm looking at him without turning around completely.

"Hi". He smiles down at me and I actually clench my legs together as a streak of white hot heat shoots through my body directly to my center.

"Hi". I mentally kick myself for my lame ass answer, I mean for god's sake high school is over I should have at least have come back with something more memorable than "Hi".

Yet he doesn't seem to mind, in fact his smile widens giving me the full effect of his pearly whites. Cue porn music.

"Ahh, I was wondering of you'd like to dance?" He raises an eyebrow and waits for my response.

Looking around at my friends I'm torn. Stay and do the right thing or go and for once enjoy a little slice of something that was just for me. It may not seem like much, a simple dance in a unpretentious bar in a small town. But for me it was like a lifeline, because for once I was feeling something other than just mediocrity.

Turning fully I offer him my hand and smile. "I'd love to. My name's Bella by the way, what's yours?"

"Edward".

Sensing all of their stares I refuse to look back at any of them as I was being lead out among the other couples on the dance floor. Oh, there'd be talk, and probably a few phone calls to boot, but how could I pass up such a delicious opportunity? This was why I had come after all, to see him again.

As he wraps me in his arms and we start to sway to the music my heart beats out an irregular tempo and I feel like I'm dancing on air. I knew this was how it was supposed to be, the feelings I was having now. But it had never happened for me with my husband. We had never shared anything as intimate or as filled with erotic heat as what was passing between me and an utter stranger.

Pulling him closer to my body I breathe in the scent of him and close my eyes. He was all man, lean and sinewy with a muscular back I allowe my hands to glide over. He pulls me even closer and buries his face in my hair sighing contentedly. I saw the wedding ring on his finger, just as I was sure he had seen mine. But we allowed ourselves this moment, this brief encounter before reality once again took over.

As the song ends he places a kiss at my temple and draws back to stare down into my upturned face. His eyes are the green of a forest that has just seen a glorious rain. He is beautiful.

"Thanks for the dance Bella, I hope you can make it again next week". Reluctantly we both pull back and take deep breaths.

"I hope so too", I whisper.

Turning away is always the hardest part, knowing that I won't be able to see his face again for another week. And it still kills me every time, even though we'd been sharing a dance every Saturday night for the past two months.

I walk back over to my table and sink into the chair, picking up my drink and taking a fortifying gulp.

"What in the H E double tooth picks was that Isabella Swan?" Angela has the sense to look scandalized.

"What, it was just a dance. Come on guys it meant nothing." I was lying through my teeth but they didn't have to know that now did they. Sometimes a girl's heart is a deep ocean of secrets, I know that's a line from Titanic but it was very true.

"Humph, it was more than just a dance Bella in looked, well it looked sexual." Another one of the women at the table states leaning close to whisper the last word with a look of pure horror on her face.

"Well obviously it wasn't like that Lauren and you know it. I just felt like taking a turn on the dance floor that's all."

They were all still staring at each other but Angela was looking right at me which made me blush even hotter. She gave me the patented "we'll talk later" look and rallied the ladies together to finish up their beverages since it was getting late.

Late my ass it wasn't even nine yet. Sighing heavily I slide my purse off the back of my chair and rise with everyone else.

"Well it sure was nice to get out for a while wasn't it girls?" Ang was trying to bring the ladies around before my scandalous behavior made the rounds over morning coffee the next day.

"Yea it was, I really needed some girl time. I swear Gerald is just so attached to me….." as we take our leave all my friends are chattering and laughing; back on their feel good high of having a night out on the town for once.

"Yes thanks for inviting us Bella; we'll have to do it again sometime. Will you be by tomorrow for the children's party?" It seems Lauren had forgotten my slip in moral staunchness.

"Of course wouldn't miss it for the world. I made them some really cute cupcakes they're going to just adore." Smiling at everyone and waving I walk to my car and slide into the front seat.

Shaking my head slightly I curse my impulsiveness. Did I really have to come here tonight just to stare at Edward all evening? It now seemes dumb to have dragged my friends here on the illusion of having a ladies night.

As I start my car I see movement in the rear view window. I would know that hair anywhere. Tapping lightly on the glass he looks around before he makes the universal motion of rolling down the window.

"Look I know this is weird and I'm probably crazy, but I can't stop thinking about you. I know this is awkward were both married, but I just feel some kind of connection with you and I'd really like to get to know you better." He stares down at me and my heart cracks just a little more.

Why does it have to be like this, my god it's so unfair. I smile weakly and whisper, "I feel the same way about you Edward. But it's like you said, we're both married and I don't want to jeopardize that for either of us."

"I know neither do I, but… I don't know… can't we at least just be friends? I swear no strings attached, I just can't watch you drive away another night and not say anything. Here, this is all my contact information if you ever feel like talking or want to grab some coffee give me a call, anytime."

He hands me a business card through the open window. Fighting with myself I finally take the square seeing instantaneous relief wash over his face.

"I just may do that. But I really have to go; I'm late as it is." I start the car and smile before I roll up the window and back up.

He's still standing there as I turn out onto the street staring after me with a look of a starving man on his face. I almost turn around, almost. But I steel myself and keep driving no longer looking in the rearview mirror. Why torture myself anymore tonight? I can feel the heat of his card even though it's buried deep in the pocket of my skirt.

What the hell am I doing? I trick myself into thinking that this is the end. I won't ever go back to that bar again, problem solved right? Wrong, this was only the beginning.


End file.
